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Published on December 3rd, 2012

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Ronald Reagan tells Communist Jokes

Most students of social science know Ronald Reagan as the 40th President of the United States, who through his space rocket program broke the back of the Soviet economy and thus freed Europe from Communism. However, Popular Social Science has taken a look at another side of Reagan, namely the joker.

Many have heard of his reply to a question in the Presidential debate in 1984 (running against Democratic candidate Walter Mondale, where the issue of his age (which was 73, Mondale’s age was 56) was raised by the commentator. After Reagan’s reply, the issue was not raised again:

-          I will not make age an issue of this campaign. I am not going to exploit for political purposes my opponent’s youth and inexperience. 

However, he also used humor as a weapon in the Cold War. We in Popular Social Science are proud to present President Reagan’s best communist jokes:

…you know there is a ten year delay in the Soviet Union for the delivery of an automobile. And only one out of seven families in the Soviet Union own automobiles. There is a 10 year wait, and you go through quite a process when you are ready to by, and then you put up the money in advance.

 This man laid down the money, and the fellow in charge said to him: Come back in 10 years and get your car.

 The man answered: Morning or afternoon?

And the fellow behind the counter said: Ten years from now, what difference does it make?

 And he said: Well, the plumber is coming in the morning.

And another one:

…the story about the two fellows in the Soviet Union who were walking down the street and one of them says: Have we really achieved full communism? Is this it? Is this now full communism?

The other one said: Oh no, things are gonna get a lot worse.

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One Response to Ronald Reagan tells Communist Jokes

  1. Michael Kubat says:

    Here’s one Reagan never knew, from my native Czechoslovakia…

    In the 1950s, the Czechoslovak aircraft company Avia designed a fighter that could outperform anything in the sky. Trouble was, even in moderate-G maneuvers, the wings tended to rip off. So they held a meeting of engineers (and, or course, political advisers) to brainstorm the problem.

    They discussed many options, but none would do without turning the aircraft into a dog. Then, finally, a young kid, who was sitting way in the back, timidly raised his hand. The chairman knew that the kid was just out of school, and decided to ignore him, but the Party adviser leaned over to him and explained that, in a proper Marxist-Leninist meeting, all voices must be heard. (What happens to them next is of course a different story.) So the chairman calls on the kid, who gets up and says: “Comrades, to solve this problem, we should perforate the wings.”

    Dead silence. Then finally the Party adviser himself speaks up. “Comrade, are you serious? Or are you mocking the efforts of out progressive country to find a way to defend itself against the Anglo-American-Zionist-neo-Nazi revanchist enemy?”

    “N-no,” the poor kid stutters. “I’m just drawing on my experience with Soviet technology…”

    Everyone present begins to tremble a little, wondering if he will be viewed as a co-conspirator. “Whatever can you mean, comrade?” the Party adviser says severely. “Are you also mocking the magnificent achievements of our glorious Soviet brothers? Explain yourself!”

    “Well,” the kid stutters, “I base my suggestion on my experience with Soviet toilet paper, which rips everywhere except at the perforations.”

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